Pastel Performs Genital & Rectal Exams Under the Influence of Hallucinogenic Antihistamines, Happiness

East Harlem, NY (GSP). According to internal GSL documents and police reports, Dr. Amar Pastel recently performed genital & rectal exams under the influence of hallucinogenic antihistamines. The shocking news came after Pastel participated in a "refresher" course on how to correctly poke, push, prod, and ultimately manipulate said body parts. Allegedly, he got a finger stuck somewhere. Authorities have been notified and Pastel is expected to make a statement through his publicist sometime this afternoon.